Six months ago I graduated from film school and looked for work but never found any. I decided to move back home to NC for a little while in order to pay off some debt and save some money. That decision has landed me in a bizarre, catalog-for-boating-supplies-order-taking world, where the sign in the bathroom reads, "If the toilet is not clear, a plunger is always near."

The girl to the right of me thought California was a country and the girl to the left of me had no idea Alaska was part of the United States.

The woman behind me is 32 and has a 17 year old, meaning of course, that she had a child when she was 15 years old; she also has a 15 year old, so she apparently didn't learn her lesson and had another kid 2 years later. This same woman didn't show up to work one day because of a sexual accident involving a Blow-Pop!

The girl next to her is a dominatrix who makes her boyfriend wear diapers, a tu-tu, and a blonde wig; they showed me his picture on the net one time. That girl ended up in the hospital because she got "too excited" dominating her boyfriend, and she had a small stroke.

The woman in the corner has 17 dogs, 11 cats, an emu, chickens and a pet racoon; her children spit in her face and she lets them. Someone once called the Jerry Springer show to recommend her for the show; they turned her down because she was just too abnormal!

Across the room from me sits the girl who is sleeping with her step-father which has caused her mom to become a raging alcoholic who throws bottles at her so she now sleeps in the barn with the cows.

There is also a hyperchondriac, a woman who is a giant (she is 6'11"), a pregnant 18 year old and a 28 year old with dentures! These people say things like, "Doctor said my baby can't git no Moor perfect!" and "Hawiuh" instead of Hawaii. "I fount a snake in my kitchen this mornin', so I jest broomed it out the door," is what the girl to my left just told me.

Blow-Pop girl once asked me what "gin-ree" meant. I said, "What?" She showed me the word...it was "genre". I suppose fate has a way of working everything out as I now feel I have a wealth of characters for my films.

Matt S, A Bit Off-Kilter